Bed time.

I went to The Late Shows and it was good*.

I made a pop-up map book in a workshop led by Yvette Hawkins, a lady who does good paper-folding. Here’s my book:

I also made a phenakistoscope using a screen printing press for the first time ever.

And I printed matches on the cover of a matchbox using an Adana press. Then the assistant had to wrap the matchbox in paper because their risk assessment said otherwise people might light matches inside the building.

So there you go. Adana is not just a delicious sort of kebab, and I liked printing so much I signed up for an etching course next weekend.

I also made paper dollys and did doodling on big paper. Both these activities were at the UVlight-lit Laing Art Gallery, which makes them ‘art’ not ‘goofing around with scissors and paper and pens’.


The doodles are mine but the drawing of people is not.

There was also eating, wandering around, drawing with charcoal taped to the end of bamboo canes, watching a video of a man bouncing on a spring and painting at the same time, snapping of glow sticks and riding of the Metro home.

*everything except the open top bus on the gosh darn motorway was good.

Maybe they’re just misunderstood.

Evil masterminds, wankers: 24 minute comic

Here is another 24 minute comic. The words were ‘evil masterminds’ and ‘wankers’.

Yeah, so it’s taken me 7 days to scan and post a drawing that took 24 minutes to do. I’m reasonably ok with this.

Teeth or two.

I painted a tea pot and a milk jug and a sugar bowl as a wedding present for awesome friends.

Things I learned during this project include:

1. Pebeo porcelaine paint is well good. I have not received any sponsorship for saying this. I really think it’s a good paint: easy to apply, a good choice of colours (even though I painted it blaaack), and easy to cook. Thanks, Pebeo!

2. Cookingis good. But cooking porcelain is kinda nervewracking. I’ve only ever painted and baked cheapo porcelain before and baking grown-up porcelain was oooh a bit dangerous as it could’ve been an expensive pile of shattered china. But it wasn’t. It was fine. Thanks, oven-that-came-with-my-rented-flat!

3. Painting a tea set doesn’t half give you an urge to drink tea. By ‘you’ I mean ‘me’. Not like a matrimonal union of you and me. Just, like, grammar, innit.

Lean a little bit closer.

Two trips down the garden path

This is the best political cartoon (I’ve) ever (drawn).

In fact, one might even say it’s a political joke. Containing at least 2 political jokes.

Dear Ian Hislop, would you like to buy this cartoon for publication in your esteemed publication? What’s that you say? Yes, yes, a thousand times yes?

And remember kids, beware strange people who make you smell the flowers.

Failing at failing.

My new comic book is called Overachiever.

It includes:

• anger cross-ness without bitterness
• hatred of Tory prime ministers
• a slightly twee free gift tucked inside the spine*
• panels and other comic book stylings
• higher production values than ever before!

The last point excites me a lot.  I’m more prouder of this book than of my earlier books.  I’m proud of them all but am LIKE TOTALLY PSYCHED! at how my drawing and book making skillz have improved.

What’s it all about, then?  Well…

I have achieved many things in life. And so have you. And so has everyone who is now or ever has been alive on this planet. Ok? Ok.

I get cross when people claim that some achievements are important and others are invalid. And that’s what this book is about.

Yes, it’s very nice that some people have bought houses. It’s not nice when they don’t know the difference between ‘buying a house with money’ and ‘mortgage is just another word for inconceivably large debt’.

My achievements include seeing a panda, baking a badass pie, and being rubbish at skateboarding.

The star-studded launch eventwas a resounding success.  This means that I went to a Paper Jammeeting, people said complimentary things and I sold 10 copies in terrifyingly rapid succession.  It was like splurge guns firing cash and splurge guns returning fire with comics.

Overachiever can be yours if you visit Travelling Man in Newcastle and ask nicely and pay £2. Or if you visit my Etsy shop and PayPal £2 including free UK postage.

*the book’s spine.  Not your spine.  Not the Travelling Man’s spine.  Not my spine.

Real craftspeople of Newcastle upon Tyne.

Ok, so not as snazzy-sounding as LiLo’s latest epic.

But I’ll have genuine snazzy things for sale at Tyneside Cinema’s Easter Market on Sunday 11th March 2012.

Please note: items purchased this far in advance of Easter may also be suitable for Mothers Day, but obviously this depends on you and your mum. If you don’t understand why your mum is in italics then maybe we should talk.

Oh heck it’s 2012.

And technically almost the end of the second month of 2012.
In my head it’s still the autumn of 1976.
But the calendar says 26/02/2012.
And you can read this as a poem if you like.

But it’s really a note to say ‘I have been continuing to make stuff and draw stuff but putting it online is all a bit much for so early in the new year’.

So until I un-hibernate, here are some arty photos of tiles from my recent holiday to Lisbon.

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The next thing I make will be a trip to the best little tea shoppe in the Toon.

Iffy, questionable.

Sketchy sketches

I went to Dr Sketchy’s event in Newcastle and drew lots of pictures of a sort of old time circus with two very good not-clowns-but-clowns, a singer, a saucy dancer, a razorblade-eater, and the man who helped set up the stage.

I also drew a picture of part of the stage and of a modern-looking light-holding tripod.

I learned that I prefer drawing things to drawing people. Or maybe that I didn’t like having to draw what I was told to draw, and for how long in which I was told to draw it. And certainly that I’m not quite comfortable drawing ladies who need to wear more clothes. But that I liked drawing in the company of other people, sitting on big sofas, stepping over tables, and looking at big anti-racist photographs. Oh, and that I briefly wanted an iPad because I saw someone do good drawings on one, but then I decided a brown paper sketchbook would be good too. And I’ve got one of those waiting at home so pffffffft to you, Apple.

Overall? Sketchy.

I’d post a link to the official Dr Sketchy’s Newcastle website, but the library internet connection is refusing to let me.

JD (but probably not the JD you’re thinking of).

Canny Communal Comics

Canny Comic Con was indeed canny, full of comics, and a convention. It was also full of the biggest communal table in the world EVER. It started off as a fun game of real-life tetris to fit lots of little blocks/books into a space/table. Then it was ohfindyourownspaceyou’relateandwe’vealreadysetup.

There were two Judge Dredd*-related incidents:

1. some bloke turned up dressed as JD**. Or it was JD. Or some bloke turned up in boring clothes and changed into JD in the toilets. Or changed into a JD costume.

2. In the pub after the Chinese buffet after the convention, the man who writes Judge Dredd kept making me tear pages of paper out of my sketchbook to feed his addiction to the Paper Jam collaborative comics drawing thingy. So someone (dunno who) has lots of exciting A4-with-a-raggedy-edge drawings to scan and share, and I have raggedy edges. And no bitterness at all because I had fun, darn it.

Another thing you should know is that when trying to take wonderful photos of the ‘Comedy in Comics’ panel I took a photo that makes it look like two panellists each have 2 legs but another panellist has 1 leg. But he has 2 legs and it’s not nice to make fun of people. But it’s a good photo. It is, I tell you. You try taking exciting photos when you can’t quite work the camera and there’s a 6 year old taking better photos and you’re trying to pay attention. Yeah.

Thank you Alex and the Paper Jammers (not a band …yet) and folks who do comics as an actual job (crikey) for making a very good day indeed. It was all friendly and there were many people.

*which is the JD I meant in the title, not John Dorian or Jack Daniels. Obviously.
**but it may’ve been Judge Stewart, which is beyond my level of JD knowledge and gosh darn it I’m not even supposed to be here today.

Reet canny.

Look! Look right here! I’m famous taking part in Newcastle’s finest comic convention.

One might even say it’s a Canny Comic Convention. Newcastle City Library, Saturday 10th December, freee.

I heard a rumour that there’ll be the best ever Paper Jam communal table with the world’s best comics available to browse and/or buy. Not like Tesco’s Finest. Actually the finest.

Seeya there, innit.